Friendly Liberal Town USA

"As you know, we defunded the police department..."

What are the latest developments concerning your police force, Mr. Mayor?

As you know, we defunded the department. Actually, we shifted funds to retrain police officers as Community Counselors. We call it the CC Service.

I understand there were a couple of incidents recently.

During a house call, two of our Counselors were shot. One was immediately released after suffering only minor wounds. The other Counselor underwent emergency surgery. He’s expected to recover.

These Counselors were unarmed?

Of course. That’s the whole point of the CC Service. But you see, retraining police officers to operate as Counselors isn’t always easy. Our investigation of the house call incident showed that.

Showed what?

That the interpersonal skills of the Counselors were sub-standard.

In what way?

They didn’t display proper deference to the men in the apartment.