Here it is: I don’t have a good victim back-story.
Somehow, I’ve managed to survive all these years without one.
As we all know, a victim-story draws sympathy like a naked light bulb on a back porch in Mississippi draws moths on a hot summer night.
And here I am, without that story.
BUT THEN I realized my victim story is: I DON’T HAVE A VICTIM STORY.
I mean, wow. Jackpot.
I may have stumbled on a new mental disorder.
I need to contact my friends at the American Psychiatric Association.